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Lawrence Low
Jan 07, 2019
In Chillin' In The Lounge
Amidst its prohibitively high cost of living, Singapore's ministers like Khaw Boon Wan and Mah Bow Tan have openly urged their citizens to send their parents to old folks homes in JB. One such Singaporean family obediently complies with the directive, and sends their father to an old folks home in Johore Bahru. After six months, they don't feel good about it and decide to go and check it out. After all, it's Malaysia ..... Upon seeing their father in JB, the first question they ask the old man is, "Ah Pa, how the 'chiu hoo kia' (a derogatory term for Malaysians) here treat you?" "I'm ok here. People here have respect for one another. I like it here." "True or not?", the son asks in disbelieve. "Are you sure? This is Malaysia leh!", the daughter could not believe in what she hears. "True lah, let me explain." The father clarifies, "You see, there is a retired judge staying here with us. He hasn't heard a case for the last five years, yet everyone here still calls him Tuan Hakim." "Then there is a retired teacher here with us. He hasn't taught a class for the last eight years, yet everybody here still calls him Cikgu." "And there is a retired violinist here. He hasn't played the instrument for ten years, everyone here still calls him Meastro." "As for me, I haven't had sex for the last fifteen years, everyone here still calls me the fucking Singaporean."

Lawrence Low

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